I know what you're thinking: "You were gone? Who knew?!"
Anyhow, I needed
a day two days off. Shoot! Who am I kidding? I could really use like a whole week off. But, alas, two days were all I could take this time around.
I didn't feel that way around 3:00 Saturday afternoon, even though I'd only been gone for five hours; missing the kids and Brian and feeling a little bit lost and lonely. I felt like Spongebob did in the episode where he chooses to live "free" with the jellyfish and leaves all his familiar surroundings of the Krusty Krab and his pineapple home and friends. (See how badly I needed the time off? When Spongebob becomes your point of reference things have gotten bad.) I even thought about calling it quits, cancelling my hotel reservation and going home but I made myself press on. I was determined not to cheat myself of peace and quiet. Desperately needed Peace and Quiet.
Cameron and Parker asked me last night, as I was tucking them into bed and administering good-night kisses, "Why did you go away?" I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying, "YOU! You all make me crazy sometimes! There's only so much one woman can take!" Because I think I've said things eerily similar to this to them before. And it isn't nice to say. Even if you kind of mean it. Especially if you kind of mean it.
After all, this is what I chose for myself. God put the desire in my heart to be a mom, to be a mom of 4 children, to be a stay-at-home mom to 4 children. I chose laundry and cleaning house and Nick Jr. and peepee on the floor and squashed-up stepped-on cheese in the carpet. But when this is all you do all day every day...and you don't get paid for it...then it all just starts to look and feel like work. A lot of work. And everyone needs time off from work.
So, I went shopping! Don't you love retail therapy? I went to Target and bought a cute Liberty of London bag and a dress for Easter and to Old Navy and bought a new pair of shorts, a shirt, a sweater on clearance and two pairs of flip-flops for $2.50 each. Browsed through several shoe stores, Barnes & Noble and bought some scrapbook paper at Archiver's.
Then I went to see Tim Burton's twisted version of Alice in Wonderland. I was the only one there. Until I was joined by one gal by herself and a family of four. The movie was very good but definitely not one I would take a younger child to see. I left feeling empowered and emboldened.
Then I went to lunch at On the Border (my favorite!). And then went down to Buckhead to check in to The W. Wouldn't have had any trouble finding it if the directions had actually mentioned turning on to Stratford. : P What a gorgeous hotel! Only had a little trouble (along with everyone else) figuring out that you have to put your room key card in the slot in the elevator before it will acknowledge which floor you want to go to. Took pictures of the stunning, contemporary room.
I thought I would do some quilting the rest of the night but couldn't pick my head up off the pillow and ended up sort of watching the NCAA tourney.
Finally gave up trying to keep my eyes pried open and went to bed at 10:00. Woke up 10 hours later. Closed my eyes again and fell asleep for another hour and a half. Showered, dressed, checked out. Went to Cracker Barrel for breakfast/lunch. Gorged myself on biscuits and gravy, two eggs, hashbrown casserole, bacon, juice and coffee. Feeling very generous and rested and tipped the waitress $10 even though my bill only came to $11.10. Wandered around drooling at ALL. THE. LOVELY. THINGS at Garden Ridge and then ended up at the library and quilted and read a book for a couple hours. Giggled silently at the man who was so completely annoyed and glowering at two women who were talking quietly at a table nearby.
Came home. Got hugs and kisses!
And wishing I was more like Spongebob. He's the consummate optimist and thoroughly enjoys his mundane job. He approaches each new day with gusto. So maybe using him as my point of reference isn't such a bad thing after all.