Our Story - Year Six

We had been married for five years when our faith was really tested.

We had done the right thing by telling Doc about our plans to move but, sometimes, just because you've done the right thing doesn't mean that the other person will.   Brian had worked hard for this gentleman and had made him a good deal of money over the previous five years but that didn't seem to matter now.   And at the first of December he told Brian that December 31st would be his last day!  (Wow!  Deja vu!)  

There was so much to do!   Brian had written up a great business plan and was presenting it to banks and asking for a small business loan but we weren't having any luck getting a loan approved.  My student loans were paid off and my car nearly paid off but we still had a high payment on a Ford Expedition, a mortgage, Brian's large student loans and plenty of "everyday" kinds of bills to pay.  And we were suddenly without any income what-so-ever. 

One night I told Brian, "I don't know what's going to happen but I do know that I love you and that won't change.  I would love you even if you were a plumber.  It doesn't matter to me what you do for a living and it won't matter if any of this works out like we hope it will.  What matters is that we will be together."

In February we found a great location for an office and we started construction on the build out in a little shopping center just down the street from our church.  Our landlord rolled the cost of the construction into our lease payment so that we needed very little money up front.  We also got a very small business loan and used that for some equipment and supplies.  

We were still trying to sell the house in McDonough and were looking for an apartment or a house to rent close to the office.  And finally in April the house sold!  We made just $1,000 from the sale of the house!  Enough for one month's rent!  But at least we didn't have that mortgage hanging over our heads.  

We happened to drive through the little neighborhood directly across the street from the office just to see if there were any houses available for rent.  There was a For Rent sign in the yard of home at the back of the neighborhood and we stopped to write down the number and inquire about the rent when a woman came walking out to her car.  She asked us if we were looking for a house to rent - she told us she was just about to put hers up for rent but didn't have a sign in the yard yet and she had come to ask this man some questions about how to go about renting her home out.  She was being transferred at her job and would be moving to Miami tomorrow.  She gave us her key and told us where her house was and just let us walk through on our own!   It was perfect and what she wanted per month for rent was in our range!    What a God Thing to meet her that day!!!

In June we opened up the office!  Brian had not worked since December 31st - six months.   And just because he was working now didn't mean that everything was suddenly alright.  But it did mean that there was hope that it would.  That at least now we had something to focus on.  Our family and our friends in our small group at church had all pitched in financially, emotionally and prayerfully. 

I helped Brian in the office for a few months answering phones, checking people out at the front desk and calling insurance companies.  Cameron and Parker stayed in the office with us and so our little family was together even at work.  Naturally, things started out very slowly but Brian was doing what he had been called to do and we were right where God wanted us.  

Depending on Him.  Celebrating our sixth anniversary

What did we learn during our sixth year?

• Do the right thing - It may not turn out the way you hoped but at least you're not losing sleep because of an unclear conscience.
• Tell him - Your husband needs to hear it said that you love him not for where he works or for what he does for a living or for the amount on his paycheck but that you love HIM ... period.
• Back him up - If your husband (or your wife) has a dream then give them enough room and time to try to make it come true.
• Share - Don't be afraid to tell people that you're going through some tough times.  You need someone in your corner praying for you.

And here's a link to Brian's contribution to today's post.

Our Story - Year One

We moved to Knoxville after we were married.  The plan was to buy an existing chiropractic office and live happily ever after...just 3 hours away from our families -far enough away that they would have to make plans to come see us but close enough that it wouldn't be too much trouble to make a quick visit.  

We liked Knoxville.  We called it "our town".  We would drive around aimlessly just trying to get our bearings and to become familiar with our surroundings and the roads.  We wanted to know it inside and out.  Ha!  That didn't take us very long.  Knoxville just seems big. 

Brian had started working with the doctor we were going to buy the practice from in August, three months before we were married.  I got a wonderful job at the University of Tennessee, in the Career Services department,  doing data entry, helping host companies that came to the school to interview soon-to-be graduates and answering the phones.  Once, during a very busy day answering 6 different phone lines, instead of answering  with, "University of Tennessee.  Career Services.  Can you hold please? or How can I help you?"  I said, "University of Tennessee.  Career Services.  Can I hold you?"   Thank goodness the gentleman on the other end didn't say Yes!

We were (mostly) cruising along well.

For two months.  

In those two months we figured out that the practice Brian was looking at buying wasn't really all it had been made out to be.  It was in a kind of remote location and Brian and the other doc had very different personalities.  Dr. Bridwell* was a dirty-joke telling kind of guy who piped country music throughout the office and his adjusting style was a little different than Brian's.  Basically, it was going to be hard to keep the existing patients and, because of the location, it was going to be even harder to bring in new ones.  So, we decided that it would not be in our best interest to buy his practice but Dr. Bridwell told Brian that he could work there until he was able to open his own office.  Very generous, right?

Then, on New Year's Eve, my sweet husband came home from work and told me, "I don't have a job.  Dr. Bridwell told me that today was my last day.  That he didn't want me on the books for the new year."  Whaaa?!  I was working for 6 dollars and 73 cents an hour.   Our rent was cheap at just $500 a month for our 562 square foot apartment, where we swore the guy above us was bowling every night, but we both had student loans, a couple of credit cards, groceries to buy and a car payment and insurance.  And $6.73 an hour wasn't going to pay for those things.  

Uncharacteristically, I didn't panic.  We celebrated the new year and decided he would have to find something part-time and we would have to come up with a business plan and get a loan a.s.a.p.. 

But banks don't give business loans to newlyweds with no collateral and big debts. So, Brian worked part-time at Williams-Sonoma at the mall and did all the laundry and house cleaning while I worked full-time at UT.

In February, my mom came for a visit for her birthday.   After she had left that weekend, Brian and I were lying in the bed in the dark and he asked me, "How long do you see us staying here in Knoxville?"   My reply was, "Five years?"  and he said, "Then let's go home!"  He flipped on the light and got out a map of the Atlanta metro area and we made a big red circle around the city and surrounding suburbs and decided he would look for an associateship or something similar within that circle.  

Lo and behold! an associate position that he had heard about before he graduated was still available in McDonough.   The doctor that owned it was a wonderful guy and he and his wife lived in this great big, beautiful house on a lake in an exclusive neighborhood. His practice was thriving and in the heart of downtown McDonough, which was in one of the fastest growing counties in America.  It looked so perfect!  He took the job and worked there for 50% of the collections he brought in to the office.  

A friend of ours very graciously offered me a job at her company working the front desk and we got a pretty, brand-new apartment just 15 minutes from Brian's work.  After a few months I accepted an administrative position at the University System of Georgia's Board of Regents in the Budget Department  and got to work just down the street from the capitol in Atlanta.  Things were a little tight financially that first year but we were back home and just an hour from each of our families.

We celebrated our 1st year anniversary in Blowing Rock, North Carolina and bought dining room furniture as our present to eachother (Tradition says to buy paper and paper is made from wood, soooo...well, that's how we rationalized it).

 What did we learn from that first year?

• Be flexible - circumstances can change so quickly it'll make your head spin.
• Don't panic! - No matter what, we weren't going to be homeless or go hungry.  Our families would be sure of that and did!  Thanks, Jim and Dixie, for all that grocery money and for paying our car insurance.
• A little humility goes a long way - Don't let pride keep you from doing an about face and abandoning a plan that isn't working.  And don't let it keep you from accepting that $100 bill your father-in-law slips you now and then.
• Invest in earplugs - apartment living means that you're going to live underneath someone who likes to move furniture in the middle of the night or who has noisy romantic encounters the floor above you.

I've asked Brian to pick a song that he feels represents each year and to write a quick post corresponding to each of my posts for the Our Story series.
Here's his contribution. - click here.

*name changed to protect myself.  ; )

I look ridiculous but I don't care.

So, an update on my neck...if you're interested is:

That apparently I have irritated a disc and Sunday morning you would have found me screaming in pain when I had to sit up or get out of bed and especially when I had to get back into a lying down position.  Excruciating.  Now I am a vision of loveliness in a cervical collar.  Can you imagine if I have to wear this ridiculous thing to the beach this weekend?  Someone on facebook suggested that I Bedazzle it!  HA!!  Maybe I could substitute it for a tightly wrapped towel.  I'm definitely going to need an outrageously floppy sun hat to cover it up.  Those would be some kind of tan lines wouldn't they?  But I feel much better today and I am optimistic that Brian will get me fixed up enough that I won't need the collar by Friday.  

Did I mention that I'm glad he's a chiropractor?  I just can't imagine our life without chiropractic.  I've been thinking about it a lot lately.  A few weeks ago we were eating dinner at the kitchen table when Landon was being silly and shaking his head around and generally being a goofball when he suddenly cried out in pain and clutched his neck.  Still crying, he jumped out of his chair and ran to me and I told him to go in my room and Daddy would give him an adjustment.  Brian went with him and adjusted his neck and not 2 minutes later my baby emerged skipping and laughing and sat back down and ate his dinner.  Later the very same evening, I was helping Anna clean her room before bedtime when one of my ribs came "out of place".  Has this ever happened to you?  It's awful.  It's like your rib is stabbing you every time you take a breath and you can't move because it hurts so bad.  Brian fixed me up and I was immediately able to finish what I was doing.  Amazing.  

I love what he does and that he does it so well.

Anna getting an adjustment.

Weekend Recap (6 Days Late)

I have a good excuse though.  My neck has felt as stiff as a redwood tree all week and I have barely been able to move it all week.  You could drill a hole in my neck and drive your car through it and I would never know.  Does the Redwood Forest charge admission?  Maybe that could be a nice little side job for me.

Saturday  (last Saturday, as in 7 days ago) - Brian took a much deserved weekend off and stayed in a hotel and did whatever a 39 year old guy wants to do when he doesn't have a wife and 4 kids to think about.  Basically?  He got to relax.  While he was gone the rest of us split up - Mom with Anna and Landon to fireworks and Cameron, Parker and I to a friend's house for games, food and fun and then fireworks afterward. 

Adults and kids alike played four-square. 

I may never learn how to take good fireworks pictures.  I laid on my belly trying to use my elbows to keep the camera still and I hurt my neck somehow while keeping my head still watching the fireworks and taking pictures. Brian has had to work on getting it back in shape every day this week.  I'm still not back at 100%.  It's getting there, though, and I have never been more thankful that he is a chiropractor and not a plumber.

Sunday we went to the Duttons' and lit firecrackers in their cul-de-sac and ate Stephanie's scrumptious peach cobbler and Marc's delicious ribs...well, not Marc's ribs (that would be cannibalism) but some animal's ribs that Marc cooked... you know what I mean.  Landon, of course, was the only one to get hurt but it was only one of about a dozen times in 3 days that he was injured in some way.   I really should invest in stock in Johnson & Johnson so I can get some of my money back from all the Band-Aids we use on him.

 

 It's kind of been a long week and I'll post something tomorrow about our adventures from Monday - Friday but for now I just have a confession to make:

I'm kind of ready for school to start.   It's hard to believe that there are only 3 more weeks of summer for us, especially when I realize that other schools around the country just started their summer breaks a couple weeks ago.  I think we've done a pretty good job this year of keeping the kids busy and also giving them time to just chill out at home.  Brian wrote a sweet post about it the other day and I honestly don't know what our summer would have looked like if he hadn't decided to take Thursdays off for the summer.  He's a huge blessing.  

And that is the understatement of the century right there, folks.  Talk atcha tomorrow!